CORNHOLE! (said in a voice of fear not ecstasy)

or Warning Signs Your Neighborhood is a Terror Target!
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Along with the prevalent strollers, joggers and growing groups of amateur outdoor beer garden guidos, the area around wicker park has become host to a new form of urban blight. “Corn Hole.” At first I wasn’t sure what it was or why bros in cargo shorts were crowding our sidewalks with planks of wood and flying bean bags, but in my heart of hearts I knew it was pure evil. Further research via the internutz has proven my concerns valid.

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the following is an exerpt from: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornhole

Cornhole in the Chicago area

This variation of the game, extremely popular on the South Side of Chicago and the southwest suburbs, is simply called “Beanbags”, “Bags”, “Baggo”, “Bags ‘N Boards”, “Bean Bag Toss” or “Tailgate Toss”. The main difference in this style is that the cornhole boards measure 3′×2′ instead of the traditional 4′×2′. The game play is slightly more difficult since the pitch is slightly steeper and you are throwing at a smaller surface. This size is often called the “Tailgate Sized” because it can fit in the trunk of a car, unlike the longer 4′×2′ boards. Also popular in this region is the beanbag slang. “Put it in the Basement” refers to one partner’s direction to his throwing partner to “get a ringer”, or throw it in the hole. “Damage Control” means to cancel out as many points as possible after an opponent gets one or more ringers. A “Blocker” is a beanbag strategically thrown such that it lands directly in front of the hole, thus blocking an opponent’s clear path to the hole. A “Savvy Veteran Move” (variation “Crafty Veteran Move”) is when a player throws his bag so that it knocks another one of his board-resting bags into the hole. The term “Star Wars” (in reference to the United States’ Star Wars Missile Defense System of the 1980′s) can be called out to a partner, and would direct the partner to aim his throw such that the thrown bag knocks an opponent’s bag off of the board. If you “fried some eggs,” it means that you’ve placed all four bags on the board without “putting one in the basement.”

I guess upon further reflection any game that brings groups of white men together to “Put it in the Basement,” “Get a Ringer,” pull something out that is “Tailgate Sized,” or drop bags in the corn hole can’t be all bad. Because in the END man on man love might slow down this crazy stroller parade.

XOXOXO

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4LIFE!